In Memoriam: Tessa Kersten-Zenger (1975 – 2018)

Tessa and I have been aware of each-others existence since 2014.  She tweeted a shorter version of a TNI-report at me when I said we were fucked because of TTIP and ISDS.

Our next interaction was in in 2016 when some dude literally submitted a motion to kill the elderly like we do with cats and dogs to prevent that they are “used up” and poop all over the place. Tessa assured me that it just was a badly formulated motion to introduce the option to painlessly kill yourself when you had enough of everyone’s shit. Having lost friends and colleagues to let’s call it surprise, shocking suicides because suddenly your son is not only in the closet but he is dangling from a noose as well meant we quickly found common ground.  Still I found myself yelling NO DEATH SQUADS (paraphrase)  to Tessa which was quite ridiculous because she absolutely had no such plans.


We closed the case when we agreed that there was at least one ass-hole pleading for killing the elderly to “end their suffering” but that he wasn’t calling for mandatory death squads. Dude was still an ass-hole though.

When we decided to follow each-other I don’t quite remember, what I do know that I was constantly in Tessa’s hair about issues concerning the political party we both seemed to be a member of.

Anywhoo we started interacting more and more and we really liked each-other, like really really. And that is quite something because I have a temper that goes from stationary to 666 in one word. I’m absolutely certain that Tessa knew I go from zero to ass-hole before you can blink and I do that for the most ridiculous reasons. Tessa accepted all of that repeatedly.

And she even loved what she called my work. I do not know what kind of work I do. I blast opinions on Twitter all day, every day. If you follow less than 2000 active tweeps I will dominate your timeline. I am an organic spambot. A bag of meat and bones who tweets almost 24/7 and that earned me the friendship of Tessa. I do not understand why.

What I do understand is that Tessa was a highly intelligent woman who probably did more for all the goals that I stand for than I ever will.

Still she asked me if she could give me a Christmas present for all the work I supposedly or allegedly do. I don’t do shit but she still rewarded me by giving me a copy of Divinity: Original Sin 2.  Tessa even reanimated her long dormant Steam-account for that and I was like meh, can’t you get an account a Good Old Games to give me the game that I pirated last week?  Cuz I kinda want it without DRM. Tessa was like nah and she was absolutely right.

Tessa knew me through and through. Tessa and a friend invited to wining and dining with me just last week but then unstoppable bullshit happened.  I’m going to blame the planet for that. Because Tessa is dead. Fuck you planet! While she could could read me to the bone and accepted my every flaw, she somehow still liked me. I adored her.

I would like to thank Tessa from the deepest of my heart for constantly fuelling the fire in me to keep sticking it to the man and above all I would like to thank you for everything. I will forever love you. And I will eternally miss you.

I love you Tessa. Thank you. I’ll never forget you.


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